MERLIN:
Do you think you might be up to just one more adventure for the
day? You have three choices left. Earth, Fire and Water.
ARTHUR:
Well, after what we just went through, I surely don't want to get
involved with any Fire. And Earth, well, Earth is just a lot of dirt,
after all, isn't it?
MERLIN:
Choose.
ARTHUR:
(Indifferent.)
Water, I choose Water.
MERLIN:
Splendid.
(To audience.)
Consider the
real magic of water.
(HE
encourages participation.)
First, it rains.
(HE briskly
rubs palms together to indicate the sound of rain. HE may have to add
[to audience] "Can you do this?" The rain falls to earth
and makes a stream. HE snaps his fingers.)
The stream
flows into a river.
(HE crosses
arms over his chest and quickly pats his upper arms.)
The river flows
into the ocean.
(HE pounds
his hands upon his thighs.)
And crashes on
the shore.
(HE pounds
his thighs harder.)
Then the sun
comes out and draws the water to the sky.
(Hands and
fingers move upwards.)
Until a big
cloud is formed.
(Makes
clouds above his head with hands.)
Then down pours
the rain...
(ALL rub
hands briskly together again.)
... which turns
into a stream and, in this case, flows into the moat of Sir Ector's
castle. Let's visit that old moat, shall we?
(SQUIRE 1
& 2 enter with silks. THEY and MERLIN manipulate them to indicate
a moat.)
Now, Arthur,
take a deep breath and hold your nose.
(ARTHUR
jumps. THEY lift silks, ARTHUR runs through, then right back out again.)
Jump, boy, jump!
(MUSIC
CUE #4. ARTHUR
tries again, this time getting caught up in the whirling silks. Then
we hear odd, lilting music as ARTHUR enters another element. Water
background sound continues through this scene.)
ARTHUR:
(Tries to talk,
but can only gulp.)
Mer-glup-lin-glug! Blop! Blop!
MERLIN:
Hold on, lad. Wait for me. Don't float away.
(SQUIRE 1
& 2 stretch silks across the stage. ARTHUR is caught between
them. We see his head, then his feet, and other ridiculous positions
as he is swirled about by the water.)
ARTHUR:
Mer-glug! Lin-glug!
MERLIN:
Now, now, set yourself straight!
ARTHUR:
I-glug, can't-glug, glug, breathe-glug!
MERLIN:
What's that, boy?
ARTHUR:
I-glug, can't-glug, breathe-glug!
MERLIN:
You must speak slower, child. Fish talk is slower than human
talk, you know. Try again.
ARTHUR:
Glug, glug, glug!
MERLIN:
Enunciation, Arthur! It sounded like you said, "Glug,
glug, glug".
ARTHUR:
(Frantic.)
Glug! Glug! Glug!
MERLIN:
For heaven's sake, stop breathing through your nose.
ARTHUR:
Glug? Glug? Glug?
MERLIN:
The ears, old boy, the ears! For heaven's sake, don't you know a
blasted thing? Breathe through your ears, Arthur!
ARTHUR:
Glug? (Breathes,
as he stands among the swirling silks.)
My-glug, ears-glug, Merlin? Merlin! I'm breathing through my ears!
MERLIN:
Yes, yes, now come along.
(ARTHUR
follows thoroughly enjoying the breathing. SQUIRE 1 & 2 lay silks
on the ground diagonally across the stage and exit.)
The world is
full of invisible lines, Arthur. Do you know the borders of Sir
Ector's castle?
ARTHUR:
Of course, everyone knows Sir Ector's property. It's two miles wide
and one mile deep and there's a big stone fence all around.
MERLIN:
But I bet you never guessed that there are kingdoms upon kingdoms
within Sir Ector's kingdom.
ARTHUR:
What do you mean?
MERLIN:
(Indicating silks.)
Why, right here inside this moat, for example. Everything on that
side of the line belongs to the King Fish. He's a Pike named Spike.
ARTHUR:
Oh!
MERLIN:
But there's freedom on this side. Freedom, boy! Such a beautiful word!
(MERLIN
grabs the silks and moves them in a huge circle. KAI comes floating
by - he's also a fish who has not learned to breathe through his ears
and is floating with his cheeks puffed up. HE gets caught up in the silks.)
ARTHUR:
Merlin! Look, it's Kai! And he's a fish too!
MERLIN:
Oh, dear. He must have been swimming when we called the Water
Magic. Sometimes things get a bit jumbled.
ARTHUR:
Close your nose and open your ears. Breathe through your ears, Kai!
KAI:
Glug?
(Breathes,
then coughs and gulps.)
Hickkk! Arthur?
Arthur? Is that you? What's going on?
ARTHUR:
Oh, Kai, Kai, it's the real magic. Merlin did it! He turned us into
fish. What kind of fish are we. Merlin?
MERLIN:
Carp.
ARTHUR:
Carp! We're carp, Kai! Isn't that wonderful?!
Note:
This is a sample from the actual script. To review the entire
play, order the PERUSAL SCRIPT (online instant download).